Sunday, January 10, 2010

Does Separated = Single

Well I don’t blog that often but I’m gonna start actually voicing my opinions on real life issues at least once every week. My blog needs it. The topic today was motivated by Alicia Keys and Swizz Beats’ [relationship]. <~ I use “relationship’’ loosely. I can kind of relate to their situation but mine is a tad bit different. I am/was (still deciding on our status) dating a separated guy. I live in a small city where everyone knows everyone and I’m 99% sure he is Separated. Before our relationship really started, to my knowledge he was separated for at least 5 years. God knows how long they were having problems. Anyhow, I don’t condone dating married men but I feel like his home was already broken and I wasn’t wreaking their relationship. We started out as only friends but friends led to a relationship. Now Im young and he was just a time passer. I wasn’t seeking a life long relationship because it’s unlikely that he’ll be my soul mate. So marriage wasn’t on my mind or anything like that. I don’t seek a committed partner because he cheated on his wife and will probably do the same to me. But I’m young and strong hearted and it’s all fun to me. My question for you is would you dated a person that is married yet separated from their spouse?? In my case, I felt like the separation is at a point that he should explore the dating scene. I mean he wasn’t living with her or anything for these 5 years and maybe more. They have had more than enough time to sort out all of their differences and see if they could work it out .On another note, at first she really didn’t like me and I understood her with that being her husband and all. But hey, she had a man living with her also. Eventually, like a year later she finally excepted it but she still doesn’t like me. As if I give a…Well in between her men (she changes like the weather) she calls and asks if they can work it out. He rejects and tell her there is nothing between them and never will be. I’ve been around him when he’s asked for a divorce and she says he’ll have to sue her before she willingly gives him one. And its one big headache and a divorce takes a lot of time and money. Plus this is the NEW generation and time is of the essence. Time waits for no man. So we like to get on with life and forget all the waiting. Some say I’m wrong and some say I’m not. I think if they’ve been dating for 5 or 6 years outside of their marriage then its pretty much over and it’s no need to pretend. What do you guys think???